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Heterosexual, Bisexual or Homosexual? |
| Find out more ... Heterosexual, Bisexual or Homosexual? |
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And
yet you may be struggling with how you feel as you are growing up, or
worrying how others perceive you, or what they think or say about you
and how they treat you. Classmates, friends, family and even our
communities can be so helpful or so harmful as you are mixing day in and
day out with others who you live and get along with. This is true in a
lot of areas of life but can be especially so in the area of sexual
orientation and sexuality. Sexual Orientation As
you become aware of your own sexual feelings, attractions and arousals
as you are growing up it can be exciting and yet sometimes confusing.
What is happening is normal as you grow not only physically but
emotionally into adulthood. Uncertainty
about sexual orientation is fairly common during puberty. In one large
survey, around 26% of students aged 12 said they were not sure about
their sexual orientation, yet by age 18, only 5% of the same students
were still uncertain. By adulthood most identify their orientation as
heterosexual, some as bisexual and between 1 and 5% as homosexual.
Some
say sexual orientation is genetically determined (although there is no
unequivocal scientific evidence confirming this). Some say that your
orientation is to do with the environment/experiences you grow up with
(opinions differ). Some people would say that they knew their sexual
orientation from quite a young age, possibly even by 10 or 11, while
others felt it was something that was unfolding through the teenage
years with quite a bit of uncertainty and even confusion along the way.
For sure sexual orientation is a deeply rooted, psychologically complex
aspect of the human experience. It is possibly formed through a
combination of genetics and early life experience. Although ones
feelings about his or her sexual orientation may change and be susceptible to social influence, no evidence suggests that sexual
orientation itself is so malleable (changeable). Irrespective
of what a person feels their sexual orientation is as they are growing
up, it is important that they don’t get so focused on this area of
their life at the exclusion of all other areas. We are all much more
than just sexual beings and balance in life is crucial. Sexuality A
person's sexuality is much more than just their sexual orientation. Your
sexuality as you mature includes how you relate to yourself, to others,
to your environment and God (if you acknowledge a spiritual context to
your life) Nearly
always physical maturation precedes emotional and psychological
development. This is one of the reasons that a young person experiences
sexual feelings and urges before they may be able to deal with the
consequences and impact of sexual intercourse. Sexual feelings and urges
do not always have to be acted on either in adolescence or adulthood. A
significant part of growing up to maturity is learning to be in control
of one's behaviours in every area of life and not allowing feelings to control
one's behaviour. As a person becomes sexually aware and
begins to experience sexual feelings and urges they have a
responsibility to take ownership of their choices as to how they choose
to behave sexually. This is true whether a person believes their
orientation is heterosexual or bisexual or homosexual. Summing Up As
mentioned at the beginning “You are special”. Whatever way you feel
about your sexual orientation now or in the future, don’t rush sexual
choices. Remember you are a special individual just the way you are. You
have your own unique history with your own positive and negative
experiences you can learn from. See yourself as special. Respect
yourself and those around you. In all relationships in the future treat
others as you would like them to treat you. If you have any questions in this area of your life, as in any other area of life, remember that it can be helpful to talk things through with a parent/other trusted adult or a member of the pastoral care team at school or your General Practitioner. |